i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
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I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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