Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
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I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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