She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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