high people should be assigned attendants
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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