my phone needs a breathalizer
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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