He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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