I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize