I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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