im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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