i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
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all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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