Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
we're so committed to being not committed
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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