and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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