OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will never coherently bang her
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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