I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize