then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize