I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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