were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize