I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
ok first of all what the fuck
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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