I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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