i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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