wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
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It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
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