Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize