Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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