I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize