Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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