This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
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