do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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