just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize