have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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