Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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