Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
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I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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