If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize