Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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