Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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