Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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