We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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