Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize