I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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