I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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