i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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