my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
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