Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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