i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
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While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
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Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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