you turned your livingroom into a bong?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Randomize