i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize