Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize