I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
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And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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