you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize