Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
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