thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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